"I don't," replied Pasch, who stated that he had a book for Walton that refuted evolution. Later, Pasch made a comment alluding to the concept of irreducible complexity, a concept

If the company can't afford a $10 tip on pizza, they aren't giving out raises or bonuses.

First and most importantly, as a former pizza delivery person fuck those cheap entitled assholes.

in re: requested memo-

This is a little off-topic, but... I had a friend who showed up to my father's funeral wearing jeans and work boots. Because that's what he wears for his job. He took his lunch break two hours early so he could come and pay his respects and I thought it was lovely. He made an effort to be there for my family and we…

MPS! I wrote a good chunk of that search engine used internally by CNN. I recognize the screen! News organizations have so much fun stuff in their archives. If you get back there, you should ask to see all the obits for people who aren't dead yet.

I assume CNN's last transmission will actually be a shot of Wolf Blitzer - cold and tired from the months of running from the machines - eating Don Lemon's head.

As if you wouldn't be depressed enough about the world ending, here's a sad video.

Certainly not for the iHeart Money company? It's why I am now living in poverty and working part time. ;)

Oh my GOD here in my part of Texas there was some poor woman who worked a gas station and I guess she was just so ridiculously hot that literally every week 2-3 guys would post Missed Connections ads about her. Meanwhile, she's happily married with a kid, right? But she's CONSTANTLY bombarded with these emails from…

My favorite kind of missed connections are when I run into guys that were homophobic to me and I see them at the gay club.

Oh shit! How come shit like this never happens in my part of North Texas?

"I'm ready to settle down" within what sounds like the first half hour of the date? No. Absolutely not. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200. Get your ass home.

Cats would never do this to anyone— they just don't have the attention span. This is why I will marry my cat and live happily ever after.

Putting this out here:

Just love your kids.