MOM, GET OFF THE INTERNET... GOD YOU ALWAYS EMBARRASS ME.

No more three inch gap between the waistband and my person when I sit down!

How about mid-rise jeans? High enough to cover the butt crack when you sit but a couple inches below the belly button. I know fashion industry, I just blew your mind.

Wanker.

Or people who, when sworn to secrecy, immediately go blabbing to their frat bros about it.

No desire to shame people who watch porn here, but I think it's okay to shame people who watch porn while actively having contempt for porn stars.

All this hate and objectification for someone in a legal profession, funding her way through an expensive college in a job she enjoys. Nothing for the person that showed the depths of his character in breaking a promise of trust.

I had my parents pay for my expensive private college, and I never for one minute forget it. This girl deserves nothing but props for standing up for herself and paying her way through school. Where is the outrage, by the way, that getting an education basically forced this girl to have to choose between a lifetime of…

Hey, America. You see this story? Yeah, that is the rape culture you hear feminists talking about. The fact you see people saying that she deserves to be raped or that she is just an object for someone to pleasure themselves with kinda proves how these beliefs are ingrained in our culture. That is a problem.

I wonder how many students attacking her have mommy and daddy paying their tuition.

"I reject all of this stupid, boring, outdated shit. I reject your numbers. I reject the idea that my personality is a negligible variable in the equation of my happiness. I reject the implication that you understand my relationship better than I do."

Great. So not only will I die by coughing up a lung, but I will have to die knowing that it's because some Portland hipster yuppie douchebag couldn't be arsed to take his daughter Cucumber to get a fucking pertussis shot between her unicycle and harpsichord lessons.

So, so disturbing. The only exemptions that should be allowed anywhere are medical ones. Legitimate medical ones.

Oregon girl this is for you.

Hear hear sister Cillian and I have been spiritually married in every way except paper since 2002. He is the reason I can't ever judge a cumberbitch.

I'm proof that kids in those situations are sometimes able to escape. It took a while, but by the time I got to college, I was no longer a homophobe!

Yeah Poor Sophia living in a world where her folks throw her a fun-ass tie dye party and are nice and fair and invite all the neighborhood kids, even the religious whackadoo's son just in case they'd feel slighted if he wasn't invited.

Shit, she's gonna be a mess, having fun, learning good manners, wearing the shit…

Of course I feel crappy that Sophia and her fathers had to see this bullshit, but also...poor Tommy. Growing up in a house full of that much hate can't be a picnic. (Assuming it's real.)

I am in a super good mood and my mood will be made even better when I stop at the cheese shop on the way home, make myself a beautiful cheese plate, open a bottle of wine and spend Valentine's Day Primetime with the Olympics. Seriously, this is the best Valentine's Day I've ever had, single or in a relationship. …