Pfft. I’ve been snorting chocolate my whole life. When I make chocolate milk with Nesquik, I don’t mix it all the way so I can eat the wet dust chunks (they burst in your mouth and you absorb the chocolate dust that was inside the wet “cocoon”). Sometimes I get a little too enthusiastic and end up inhaling the…

I heard if you insert a chocolate coated tampon into your vagina you will shortly afterwards poop Hershey’s kisses. It true. I read it on the internet. I think it was Goop.

Isn’t the whole point of chocolate that it tastes good? Why skip that part?

Yes, but I think it’s a bit too much to introduce 17 different characters in one episode, no?

Kendall left with Cara

This is my boyfriend, Gus Kenworthy:

After living with a small person for the past 4 ish years, I think if I were designing the system from scratch, I’d leave sex off birth certificates but make it easily accessable in medical records and everyone’s gender would be “baby” for the first 18 years of their lives. Then, at 18, you now have the option of…

Me, just now: la. . .me? La me? Doesn’t ring a... oh goddammit.

Just a casual reminder that Karlie Kloss may or may not become a Kushner, so it’s literally hanging out with Donald Trump and his friend.

Oh Hannah, it;s pretty obvious what’s goin on. Swifty and Karlie broke up, Swifty is devastated and not leaving the house, and Karlie is trying out Kendall for awhile.

“Some, like Buzzfeed, have interpreted this renewed alliance as shade.”

myeh, Australians are probably just pissed off with dumb showbiz americans after the whole Johnny Depp shit show.

I...don’t know what a pasty is haha. But this is a four n’ twenty meat pie:

I didn’t think I would, but I actually agree..

“When I was born, doctors looked at my genitals and made assumptions about who I would be”

For reference, this is a model in a 32J bra.

I’m a 32J, which is also a type of aircraft, but my boobs aren’t even half as big as that makes them sound.

You know what drives me nutty? When I see an enthusiastic recommendation of a sports bra for big boobs and I get all excited and I click on it and they don’t even carry sizes beyond DDD.* I keep falling for it, every single time!

While we’re complaining about shorts and summer clothing remedies, can someone please tell me for the love of little green apples is there a way to make my crotch stop eating my shorts? I have these visions of wearing a lovely floaty sheer embroidered top over shorts but then it’s all a clam jam up in there and I…