....."Ms. Benes the hat you charged to the company was Sable, this is Nutria"

Like many young Mormon men of his age, he's heading off on a two year mission before enrolling at BYU.

It worked for Ziggy Ansah

Taking a shit in front of people in Brooklyn, is also known colloquially as a Deron Williams.

I went from a C student to an A student in college by making these simple changes:

all of them. He took his Lipitor.

Me too, but I don't think that's legal anymore.

Give Seattle credit. As the defending champion heel, they tried to get DQ'd at the end and keep the title belt. Flair would be proud.

Pun intended.

I've got this awesome hippie Wiccan facebook friend, and she posted a link to an article about vaginal steaming the other day, and no lie, Facebook's top "suggested link" underneath my friend's post was a link to a food.com recipe for steamed clams.

Roadhouse is the worst movie ever made, it's inspired a generation of idiots.

That blank space that pops up when you click "reply" doesn't have to be filled in, you know.

IN FLAGRANTE DETESTO

"need you home a sap"

I love the fact that we're all looking at that picture and seeing the same thing.

That second picture. For the love of JESUS.

Throw Mamba from the Train

Bryant was quoted as saying "Actually, I'm feeling much better and might be back next week." In unrelated news, the Staples Center was fumigated for scarabs, and Robert Sacre was found dead in the parking lot with his eyes and tongue ripped out.

A friend of mine went to UGA, and claims Matt Stafford spilled an entire pitcher of beer on her at a party. He apparently tried to calm her down by explaining "Hey, hey, it's okay. I'm Matt Stafford." Then he walked away.