Well Ted, allow me to retort:

What, you don’t like cheap strawberries?

I’m more of a reese’s pieces man myself, but I like any candy that I can eat handfuls of.

Imagine a bowl of 3 million skittles, but one of them is an m&m.

Walter Scott was armed too, until it turned out that there was video of him not having a weapon and being shot in the back.

Umm, All of it?

He’s a grown up version of Spalding.

Hopefully also in Spanish.

“Johnson, I know you’re new to the force. I just want you to know that the most dangerous part of the job is that your feelings may get hurt. No, your feelings will get hurt. If that happens, don’t let anyone tell you not to throw a tantrum. Don’t let them offer you overtime to watch football, just take your gun and…

Depends on what he named his penis.

It was supposed to be a google search.

That’s because the fight for Gray Writes isn’t over yet.

There once was a woman who,