Something something, Peg, something something left hook

They call Alabama the crimson tide/ Call her black and blue.

Hey Nineteen (to Twenty-four Months, if convicted)

Would you like to fall into a deep, dark internet hole about Bristol Palin faking the month of her child’s birth?

Let’s be real about terrorism for a moment. The purpose of terrorism is to use violence to enact a political agenda that isn’t achievable by normal political means, usually by scaring people enough to get them to act like idiots. Are you scared? I’m not and I live in Oregon. I’ve actually BEEN to the Malheur…

Is...is it just because I’ve been drinking a lot over the holidays, or is it a decent Double Creature this week?

I would have thought Gwen’s cravings would be for freshly hunted and cooked venison considering her personality change since she started dating him.

GWEN & BLAKE: PREGNANT

He got a new sweater.

It’s not like some of us were alive when these movies were out! I AM NOT DEAD YET, INTERNET!

Please make this a thing in 2016!

If you haven’t picked up any Leon Bridges, you should do yourself a massive favor and grab his album. I think it’s what you’re after.

“If it’s got to be a woman”...

I love how she just sits down with her purse and hammers that shit out like a Sunday school teacher for the first half of the song. Then something shifts and she gets the Holy Spirit and just tears it up. And then you realize she wore a fine fur just for the wonderful showmanship of tossing off a fine fur in the…

Why can’t the world have more performers like Aretha? Seriously, young pop stars these days need to take a page from her book. Train your natural voice, learn a fucking instrument, and become a talented BAMF.

Will you be mine, Coal Mine?

Oh, I can’t ski worth a flip either. I just love mountains and snow and gorgeous scenery. And mountains.

I am destined to die on the flat, hot, humid, pretty-in-spots-but-not-like-Colorado Texas Gulf Coast.

Diva says I’d miss the water too much but I’m not sure.

I got the same one, and as someone who lives in Colorado the most upsetting part about this is someone who is a) voluntarily going to Aspen at Douche Peak and b) wearing Chucks when there is like 2 feet of snow on the ground. Girl, you gonna FREEZE. It may be 70 in NYC but it’s like 7 here.

Result: Congrats! This Aspen retreat will upset you the most.

Spot on, baby. SPOT. ON. {Sob. Why can’t I live in the Colorado mountains??????? I don’t even need to be rich or in Aspen!!!}