Whoa whoa whoa, not gonna sit here and let you shit talk Newsies.

I don’t think the solution to the imbalanced application of law enforcement in the United States is for the heavy-handed destructiveness wrongfully applied in certain quarters to be applied in more places. I think the solution is for everybody to get a grip and stop pretending to see legitimate danger where there is…

“Fine, Chip. We’ll make sure it’s a White Christmas.”

I’m not used to seeing 4 consecutive basketball plays without a foul or timeout

go back to boring us with your soccer deadcast takes, you fucking commie

Except that Landon personally quit on the US men’s national team that he claims to love more than the “foreigners” at which he is throwing shade. Landon Donovan is a petulant baby asshat.

Seriously though, fuck Kyle Wagner.

Should have just hit a woman instead, he’d have no trouble getting back on the field.

A true leader that wears number one, to remind himself of his team’s record.

Drew Magary Status:

Sure, Bobroczkyi looks stiff out there. But you should see how ten minutes in bubbling hot water relaxes him.

What Angela didn’t mention was that she used to bounce professionally.

Dear Gawker Media:

As Gilbert’s post proves, if you have that many butts running around the arena willy-nilly, you’re bound to end with some major pieces of shit in the stands.

We don’t want that fancy brain thinkin’ humor around here, give us swear words in Boston accent’s and Emmitt Smith jokes.

That’s an odd name. I’d have called them chazwazzas.

Hinkie, man. Go back to work.

And the crowd goes wild!