Dude’s 33. That ship may have sailed.

Ditto. Solid baker, very charming, had a mild crush on her throughout the season.

Maybe that’s what makes it a mild spoiler?

I think this guy can be forgiven for not including the Civil War in his statement.

Personally, I use ButtCo Brand butt covers when I need to cover my butt this pathetically. Give ButtCo a try, Jason, covers your whole butt or your money back!

But how could anyone go from Rihanna to Taylor Swift?

Draylor

“Gentlemen, Ladies, Board members, As the new Chief Creative officer, I have one word for you. One word that will define our brand for the next century. That word....is boobs.”

Oh come on. Ciara can’t be that bad.

Consider yo’self before you wreck yo’self.

Yo. You’re sinking this Polling Firm/Hat Company before I’ve even got off the ground.

Hats double as polling. Sell people hats then count the hats.

Bartender says “Why the long face?”

Show me where in the rule book it says an Adult can’t play in a Youth football game.

Sure, I’ll give her a shot. Does she like Pizza Bagels?

Well now I’m really confused. What dating app should I use if I want to go out with Britney Spears?

Awww man. If they were looking for a fat guy who wouldn’t help them very much I’m right here.

Harvard Men’s Soccer Team or, in mathematical terms, Asshole³