Your mom is a complete boss for getting through that whole thing with a straight face. I’m pretty sure I would’ve completely melted about the third time I tried to say, “Actually, it’s a parasol,” to the bus driver.

This is about my twin sister. First day of school, she was in second grade. A boy named Ricky started picking on her. Pulling at her hair, slapping, kicking and terrorizing her. She was scared but nobody did anything. The teacher just told Ricky to stop it but he continued. He was big and an asshole. He grabbed her…

So, when I was in kindergarten, I wasn’t allowed to carry an umbrella on the bus.

I’ve been working on improving my cooking skills for the past year. This resulted in a very tearful conversation with my husband, where I had to explain that if I was going to spend 8 hours in the kitchen making ravioli from scratch at his request, he could at least take a fucking bite before drowning it in Sriracha.

V…

THOSE GIRLS WERE GHOSTS

When I was young, I pretty much watched exclusively Disney movies and musicals. As a result, I thought it was perfectly normal to “sing your feelings”. I stopped after a very awkward moment in first grade.

So...both? I realize there’s a spectrum of oppression for women, with Taylor Swift pretty much rounding out the “low-stakes” end. I also think it’s pretty clear that the Jez community has a ways to go before approaching true intersectionality. But I honestly, no-snark-intended, don’t understand how her speaking out on…

At least, she stays true to form - still no belly button

Hydraulics are just a car’s way of twerking.

it’s like not even the dudebros. it’s just HOW FUCKING ABOVE IT ALL they general seem to think they are? like 4chan embraces their shitty basement dwelling selves. they know, in general, that the loudest part of their comentariat are juvinile, petty dicks. reddit seems to think itself so far above it all when they are…

I don't know why anyone would be obligated to do anything in the bedroom. Penises of the world, no one owes you a blow job, no matter how swell you think you are.

If you read enough comments here, you will certainly see that Canadians, British, Swedish—you name it—commenters firmly believe racism ONLY exists in the US.

Your story actually happened, and you are still getting second-guessed! Isn't the world a magical place? A fucking magical place.

Looks like it's time for someone to edit the Saint Louis Cuisine Wikipedia page...

Hi, I just had post this reply so you could see it in your notifications. It appears some asshole has hacked into your Kinja account and is posting stupid and unnecessary contrarian posts with unnecessary semantics arguments.

And, on that infamous evening in New England, as the snow banks stood massive and the tears of hipsters everywhere fell as they watched the power they had habituated to receiving from whipping out their iDevices and typing furiously upon their single star...

Pork Wine. The OTHER white wine.

Man, I do not want to meet a regular dinosaur much less a hallucinating dinosaur that is tripping balls and is going to accuse me of being a witch. No thank you, time machine, not today.

god: the ultimate Nice Guy

It's right there in Joss Whedon's first draft, too.

THOR: It is hopeless. My brother Loki is unstoppable. Not even our combined power can defeat him! Unless...