I do, I did, and you’re a mouth-breathing racist. 

“Weekend” is actually a real solid band that I’m overtly pissed at The Weeknd at for overcasting their sun rays.

As a Red Sox fan, this is petty, petty shit. Richard Petty/Tom Petty.

It’s been a real thrill educating you, but I’ve got more pressing matters to attend to. Hold the door open for strangers!

Don’t confuse self-guilt with knowing the difference between right and wrong. It’s common among the selfish. 

This seems like the most amusing possible outcome.

Clearly that doesn’t apply to your digital neighbors. Seems appropriate that you’re hedge-adjacent...

Wide right, Ray Finkle! LACES OUT! YOU MISSED!

“Those characters are real to people, dammit!” - and these people are morons.

Can @Deadspin just collectively forget about this guy already? It was never funny. 

That twat’s approach IS TIRESOME (others clearly agreed).

Reread your last comment and if you can’t figure out why, go to your local community college and learn about context clues. 

Allow me to paraphrase for you: “Wah wah wah, I’m a twat, wah wah wah”.

Plight has nothing to do with any of this and you’re a selfish asshole. Be gone. 

What can Brown do for you?

This is totally awesome. 

So long as they’re “available”, yup!

We’re truly blessed. Praise Jah. 

Fair attempt but generally useless, as empathy is a positive quality in any context. 

Totally fair. That’s our general policy on desktop speakers.