I imagine Trump’s perfect woman is that lady who was painted gold in the movie Goldfinger. She’s attractive, gilded and doesn’t say anything.

Aside from redeyes it’s been years since I have been on a flight that isn’t full.

Nerd Ferguson

Asked for comment Bernie Kosar said, “where am I?”

Tom, you have kids. What if they witnessed the battle in Aleppo?

Fuck me, more room taxes to go with the resort fee and now parking fees and computerized drink comp systems? Remember when Vegas wanted you to gamble?

Have the Browns defense checked for concussions now. They have serious problems tracking moving objects.

At this point I feel disliking him is a reflection of me being an asshole. But, I’m ok with that.

Wait until he loses and contests every county. He will sue everyone for years. This doesn’t go away after November.

Tell Rose this post isn’t consent to only win 17 games this year.

Quite the whiz kid

Bielema thought he said, “I got your Reese’s, they’re fucking deep fried!” Deprived of his post game snack he had the man arrested.

Trump is an Elder God. All who gaze upon his true form as he eats well done steaks go mad and say insane shit on TV. Cunthulu!

Trump’s in your pussy Werder!

Fuck that. This is your candidate RNC, live with it.

The only way her daughter heard that is if she was sitting in an airport.

It’s like every time I go to the dentist I wake up and my ass hurts. It’s crazy how the body is put together. Hair and mouth, tooth and anus. Who knew?

Every Cubs fan is on one ass cheek after last night.

Gaze at your destruction Cubs fans.

That show is terrible