if nothing else, marvel in the author’s god-tier yoga flexibility in twisting the rest of the human population into the one’s who screwed up here.

Omg, what a fucking mess. I’m glad you and the fiancé are on the same page however. Here’s my take:

So we can assign bathrooms apparently

That, or Putin isn’t going to do anything because he already knows how things are going to go with his puppet, I mean the U.S. president-elect.

Tell me about it. What parent would risk Putin their child in danger?

Better yet, they should have their children taken away for child abuse.

I was just thinking, “Don’t drink the nog, DON’T DRINK THE NOG”. Even just drinking coffee he looks terrifying. You just know he’s planning some special Christmas surprises.

Any American parent who would let their kid within a hundred yards of Putin right now should get their head checked.

Imagine how exhausting and unpleasant it must be to have to publicly pretend to be friends with Kanye West and thus have to be on the receiving end of his torrent of bullshit.

That’s nothing. I got a nasty splinter at my aunt and uncle’s cabin in Colorado years ago. Since then I’ve had a plan for peace in the Middle East that i’ve tried to get heard but no one will take seriously. I even slept at a Holiday Inn Express to make it sound more credible.

the two of them are made for each other because they are both talentless and pathetic!”

I don’t remote believe the Beyoncé gossip, mostly because I don’t believe Beyoncé ever stoops to full on fighting with her enemies. I would believe that Kim called Beyoncé and Beyoncé said nice-sounding things to her, and then Kim got off the phone and realized every last word Bey said to her was absolute shade.

I get it, Lindsay. I cut off the tip of my finger while chopping sweet potatoes and now I truly understand the plight of the Maori.

I wonder who he DOES consider racist if not himself? Like, does he think you aren’t a racist unless you are literally burning a cross on someone’s lawn?

They can’t fetishize her properly because she has actual power.

She’s treated a lot like how Serena Williams is treated. Williams has been called a man by so many people and so has Michelle. I’m wondering if it is because both women are black, strong and athletic. That racist can’t stand their mix of strength and power so they deny their womanhood.

“Excellent. Take your ball and go home, that’ll show ‘em. I’m sure they will think about your protest of apathy every day. Heck it may just interrupt their work day. In your little world that revolves around you, you will have won! Selfish prick.” - Your neighbors/community/planetmates

I hear/read a lot fewer stories about how Trump embodies an ugly strain of American fascism lately. I guess maybe if we ignore this shit we’ll all get comfortable with it.

The constant flood of Michelle Obama comments over the last 8 years really do flummox me.

“I’m not a racist — those are only things I say from my true heart-of-hearts in private to my friends!”