If you’re going to waste 750 million dollars in Vegas at least get a blowjob and cocaine out of it.

I'd say in this case, it's definitely not a good idea to put $750 million on black in Vegas.

Shit, I hope Kobe doesn’t see this and call Peter Theil or his asshole lawyer

A spokesman for the LAPD said that to honor the day they won’t pass up the opportunity to shoot.

Oh, I get it. Because 8/24 was the best he ever shot in a game.

I am so hot right now.....

Which will end with Gronk getting suspended 10 games and the team being fined $1m

Apparently, they pulled him right out of the stands to start. Sad!

For the impending Cards fans

I am afraid to see the responses to this series from the new readership.

Jonathan Niese starts and pitches 1/3 of an inning, giving up three runs, and the Cardinals lose. Way to go red birds!

They only let Harambe lose one time. #doublestandard #neverforget