Directed by Roman Polanski.

I’m cautiously optimistic about this one, though Nic Cage isn’t exactly “supporting actor” material.

Anyone remember Quantum Break? It was supposed to be Microsoft’s new big video game but they botched the marketing. Still a great game though and a big part of that is Lance Reddick’s performance.

Oh that’s easy -- Ticketmaster is the same company that owns or operates many of the venues. So they have a lot of leverage when it comes to big tours.

Michael Douglas looks like he’s ready for a starring role in a casket.

Wait... when was this announced? I know I’m not the first to comment but isn’t this like a couple of weeks late? I’m a huge MST3k fan but I’m also getting old and probably losing brain cells faster than you can watch the “Manos: The Hands Of Fate” opening sequence.

Is she trying to be the next Johnny Depp or something? Because I’ve heard that doesn’t always end well.

Here, let’s let Nic Cage explain this to himself:

What I’m getting from this is that Elon Musk needs to audit his way up to the OT levels.

How about they call it “Shut Up, Wesley” and it’s a sitcom?

You might say Dracula’s blood runs in his family or something.

Oh no! What will they do about Tony Bladerunner or Stephanie Starwars?

“And what’s the deal with rocks?”

Yeah, that’s right.

He is doing the press for Ant-Man as his On Cinema character which is arguably even funnier.

Maybe if they had released the cut with the full 17 hours of ice cream scooping, the movie would have done better.

Huh. Let’s not tell them that you can also watch the show for free on the South Park website.

That’s chump change for a company that lost $99 billion back in 2002.

Nah, fuck that. Get the giant hand from Jackass and slap everyone with it.

If Zach brings on Tim & Eric and it’s just the three of them wearing stupid wigs and yelling at each other, this could be great.