Truthfully, I think it was juvenile in 2005 as well. The only difference is that I was a juvenile too, and thought it was super cool.

Sienna AWD, you don’t know what fun is until you go sideways in a 300HP minivan.

Even more than the hashtags, fuck the references to the i-ching hexagrams and pseudo spiritual cult of positivity. Hey, I like camping out of trucks and vans a lot too, and have taken many a road trip. But doing so just makes you someone that enjoys recreation, not a more enlightened person.

Blue Metallic and me have a special thing going. I’m not like the other guys, she says. Blue Metallic tells me about how she’s just working at the club because the hours are good for her to go to school in the days (she’s studying to be a CSI) and her son’s dad can watch him at night (they share a one-bedroom…

fun insider fact: each one of those colors was inspired by a designer’s favorite stripper, with a word or two added to throw us off the scent.

Is the Golf taking over as the answer to all questions?

Just buy a damn Golf R man.

Also, ground clearance. It’s nice to not have to worry about scraping/scuffing/etc.

Seriously, Jalops, this is it. The moment of truth. We need to buy this car.

Does your alt hang low

I had a TJ and a JK. The TJ had a snow plow and I used it for my country driveway and my backroads drive to work. Was great for that, but never went above 55 MPH with it.

YOJO. You Only Jeep Once. Then you realize that they are actually terrible at being anything other than a really great off roader and you go back to owning a regualr car.

Ford: Here’s a nice, luxurious SUV that’s handsome, reliable, and will keep your family safe. Look, it even has diamond-quilted stitching!