Changing it after the fact is better than not changing it after the fact.

#whitesagainstfullerhouse

This video needs more Bunko and Skinnygirl margaritas.

Sorry, the lock on the cage somehow came lose. We’ll tighten the restraints this time. EVERYONE GET IN THE VAN.

When I ask her if it’s hard to play a cheerleader type

But that’s just it. Dolly Partin and Bob Newhart are so nice and polite they’d never do it or at least apologize for doing so.

You think SHE of all people would show some etiquette and respect towards the people performing.

But if Dolly Parton cut you off in traffic, it would be by accident, she would apologize in a way that would leave you smiling and feeling good about yourself for weeks afterwards and she’d probably buy you a new car

What he actually is is “swarthy” which is good enough for Hollywoo.

OH MY GOD WHITE PEOPLE JUST BE PALE. THAT IS HORRIFYING. SIT IN THE SHADE PLEASE.

Okay raise your hand if you’d vote for Vincent Vega before you’d vote for any of the GOP candidates on that stage.

America is like a baby wearing boots on the ground. Who I tried to stab once when I was a teenager, but when West Point offered me a scholarship I said no I can’t accept. I have to get to the pyramids in Egypt where all that grain is stored and feed it to all those wimmenz so they don’t get riled up.

“This was not someone who was, and I hate to use the phrase, ‘asking for it.’ There are girls out there that seem to be temptresses.”

From “I Know Why the Caged Bird Tweets.”

He’s got nothing on good ol’ Dime Eyes.

No, if there was a threat and it was on the news and there were news trucks and reporters and we all had to go home from school and there was all of this excitement, I would be piiiiiissssssssssssed if my teacher, plus fucking Malala, made me miss out on all that, plus the bare possibility that I would run into the…

Well this is MY fantasy, dammit!

Tell me where you got this bear right now or I'll throw you into the Sarlacc pit

Thanks now that you referred to sex as a “goop heist” I'm never doing it again

You sue to get your nickel back.