Get on the court, or get dragged out of the arena, bub. LA’s using the United Airlines method of fan involvement!

Sounds like an excellent time for the team to whip out the ‘Pick The Lineup From The Audience’ promotion! Look under your seat, and if you find an actual uniform, get on the court, you winner, because you’re now a Los Angeles Laker!

I’m glad that the NBA is solidifying the message I’m teaching my children. Their future is entirely dependent on the results of the lottery.

I can’t believe Ron Artest is still in the league.

It’s interesting and a bit weird whenever a celeb shaves off their famous beard.

If we’re so slow, how come we caught and enslaved you?

If a player (say AG) wanders in there, do they pull a screen down real quick? Jump in front of it? Distract him?

Still better than their 90s version:

Just another well run organization by the DeVos family.

“I don’t know WHY I leave this lying around!”

Tony, if you are reading this, hear me out... how about the Mets?

Dave Bliss, moments after the interview:

Where will you be when diarrhea strikes?

I am so fucking drunk right now.

My parents wrote a book called, “My Son May Be Ty Cobb”, on a count of the fact I was always chokin folks and slappin around crippled fans.

A toddler might say to you, “Vroom vroom, I am a truck!”

This conspiracy is triple-double crazy

Wow, so now cornerbacks can’t even yell and wave their arms without getting called for interference.