“Bite me.”

And just to add to this, Baylor never defended against anybody.

Wes Welker doesn’t remember witnessing any wrongdoing under Briles.

But they didn’t cover up a murder this time, so progress?

*files copyright infringement*

Hard to believe that a church affiliated entity might have trouble dealing with sexual crimes

One thing I haven’t seen anyone talk about is the physicality with which OKC is covering Curry. They haven’t been letting him run free around those screens like usual, which oddly enough I don’t think I’ve seen anyone else even try to do.

Impressively literate for a horse, Nyquist does make mistakes. For instance, he later Tweeted, “You’re rubber, I’m glue.”

“I called Kobe when I was still playing in Orlando and asked him what I should do. He’s the one who told me to do take 1,000 a day.”

Hootie and the Blow.

I would never call a team that employs Prince Fielder “gutless.”

Yellow ball, doesn’t count.

Yeah hospitals always tell me the same thing.

Folded over white bread sandwich filled with BBQ brisket, pickles, onions, and extra BBQ sauce. All y’all northerners can go fuck yourselves.

“Would you protest me? I’d protest me.”

If he asked for 100 women and their cats he could have gotten them all from Jezebel.

Maybe his post has been on hold all this time.

I’m not a legal expert, but I’m like 99% sure he’ll end up being forced to coach a hocky team of ragtag misfits. From what I’ve seen in the movies it usually works out surprisingly well.

What else were they expecting from Pirates?