The guy has not even started playing for the Knicks yet, let’s hold off on any and all “worst nightmare” talk.

In Minors, the Clap is Back

I hate the O’s hat because it’s a lost opportunity for an infinite regress, with the bird’s hat having the bird in a hat on it, etc.

They’re into weird birds.

“Shitting your pants at Engadine Maccas” sounds like something you do facing the God Emperor of Dune. 

Brazilian goes jogo bonito on an animated füssball player.

Michigan St. ignored again, even when doing more than both. #Nassar

Sure the Portsmouth fan was in the wrong, but let’s remember that O’Nien is no Southampton player himself.

“The Day The Lights Went Out”

In 1990, when Harvey Gantt was running against abominable Jesse Helms, Jordan refused to endorse Gantt by making that sentiment, if not that verbatim quote, amply clear to many people.

This is not quite accurate— post-Masters 1997 Tiger flashed a little bit of social edge. After Fuzzy Zoeller crackered his way out of a K-mart sponsorship via “collard greens” comments, Tiger let it be known he was not pleased and let him twist in the wind before forgiving him (I wish he had never forgiven him, and I…

The video is suppressed, now also thrown out, yet here we all are watching Robert Kraft get off. 

He flinched, he has to marry his mom.

“It only took him seven years to learn how to hit that pitch.”

The other day I thought I’d woken up on third base but really I’d just fallen asleep next to my roommate’s calzone.

I’m very glad, for your psyche’s sake, that you’ve blocked out the last eight months of professional sports in order to imagine Bostonians aren’t barfing ambrosia.

Aubrey Huff looks like the product of Mark McGrath fucking Duke Nukem.

*Rex Ryans bursts in, wheezing*
Heard the...headline...need to...hear more.

In any case, Weird Al now has his Lil Nas X parody figured out.

Their analytics team really likes Beigian formulas.