I feel like most people pretty much understood that Glennon was simply a stop-gap when they signed him though. The people that were actually shocked and angered by this, probably don’t know a whole hell of a lot about football. Can’t just sign any shitty QB during a rebuild and put the entire workload on Jordan…

Their team hashtag (#BearWithUs) doesn’t inspire confidence

That’s ok. Christianity plagiarized most of it too.

I think most people know that’s a meme.

Don’t forget St. Gus of Asparagus, Patron Saint of Stinky Urine.

Where does this madness end? It’s frankly ridiculous to insert asparagus into the story of a cosmic Jewish zombie who was his own father and can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is…

Have we reached the point that we are thankful that rich people don’t commit physical assault when they don’t get what they want? Wow. We live in sad times indeed.

How long were they without water though?

My favorite tweet that I can’t find now.

Because it was all trustafarians with absolutely zero perspective. For rich sheltered dipshits, anything less than easy comfort is suffering.

Right? “A whole bunch of people with a ton of disposable cash didn’t get the luxury they were expecting. We expect them all to survive and make a full recovery.”

I can’t get over how everyone speaking about this FYRE fiasco keep talking about people being “safe”. You can almost hear the hushed tones around the word. Give me a break. A day or two stuck on an island in the Bahamas with apparently no water or plumbing system admittedly sounds awful, but I really don’t think…

Actually, this was a 50 year old Cubs fan who was shoving a shoulder mounted video camera in my face, outside the Sox stadium, while I was walking to the train. He was being an ass and was yelling “How did you like that one, how does that loss feel huh?” like a highschool bully. He walked backwards and got in my…

It’s really amazing when a team picking 3rd overall in a draft actively makes their team worse with the draft pick.

If we can have Muscovites and Liverpudlians, we can have Detroticians. I wish fake demonym creation was a paying job.

If he becomes a HOF QB, you obviously won’t mind losing a few third round picks. But I don’t think that’s going to happen. And there’s no way in hell the 49ers were sitting at 2, planning on drafting this kid, but were swayed by two thirds and a fourth. So he would have been there at 3, which makes the trade stupid.

Baltimore’s won two without ever having an elite quarterback.

“Do NFL or AFL Championships count?” — 90-year-old Houstonians, Detroiticians and Clevelanders

“Actual Sconnies are more reasonable and don’t act pompous about their team.”

He was thinking of bringing a sign listing all of the subpar QBs Chicago has cycled through its shit factory over the last 65 years since Sid Luckman last suited up, but it was 138 feet long, comprised of 52 separate poster boards, and totally unwieldy.