Crackle? You'll be lucky to make it onto Laff with that pitch.

I don't think it's very nice to call Eddie Anderson an "it."

To be fair, we/they are yokels and hillbillies, not to mention dirt farmers, ice farmers, shitkickers, clodhoppers, stumpjumpers, kinlickers, unclefuckers, cowtippers, cornhuskers, sandbillies, armadillo killers, cannon fodder and Methodists.

We've got a lot of Sikhs behind the counter of liquor stores and conveniences stores out in Phoenix.

Goddamnit, I kind of want to see this now. I really liked John Wick, and I mostly liked JW2, so I'm in for this sort of heavily stylized, non-stop mayhem.

Those are all in the NFL Players' Mothers Museum.

"Rufeez & Loob" sounds like a racist vaudeville act.

… hot pocket…

"I wanna see where people lived in terror for months before being dragged away to be murdered. I've set the whole day aside."

He saved that for the Anne Frank House.

Were all the frames tilted at odd angles?

"The Mona Lisa isn't a better painting, it's merely a more famous one. Plus, the thing is tiny—it's like, this big."

You're gonna have to skim the Jim soup three or four times.

Sessions is just good enough of a lawyer to realize that he didn't want to be anywhere near this bullshit.

That bullshit with the British reporter where we had to hear about the Mooch's tough childhood?

This is worse than that casting call to be on Broadway with Captain America.

Your kid's 10, and he can't get a Greg Giraldo bit right yet?

Oh, like Truman Capote.

Yes. My handwriting is bad now, and it was much worse as a child, but it wasn't that bad, even in fourth grade.

HI-YOOOO