Not being able to understand social conventions is a big part of what's called "autism".

Three hundred fucking dollars for headphones that you wouldn't use for listening to music? NO.

'Scuse me while I w'ip dis out.

"How about a no beej for douches rule?"

"Would of"? No, you WOULD HAVE.

Dammit guys, spoiler alert tags plz

Oh man, I have a very specific procedure for handwashing silverware for that very reason. :(

HOW ARE THESE GODDAMN THINGS EVEN LEGAL ANYMORE. Every third story here involves a fucking mandolin.

I got my thumb jammed in a meat slicer, the blade was so sharp and the wound was so clean that I didn't even realize what was going on until, you guessed it, "Something's wrong here. OH MY GOD"

Not many people believe this story, but it's true and I'm going to tell it anyway. It's actually about a narrowly avoided injury, so if you want gore move on.

I had burns like that a couple times, my buddy called them "frog throats."

Doesn't mean it isn't.

I think it's too easily misunderstood as the opposite of what he's saying, and therefore ineffective.

I'm sure your politicians always make the right decisions. :)

We spend more on Medicare/Medicaid (as one category) and Social Security (as another category) EACH than we do on Defense. The current healthcare crisis here isn't really a budgeting problem.

I've been shaving my head for over 20 years, and I've always just used regular razors and cream. Your scalp may prefer something different but don't be afraid to try the stuff you already have; these days I just use Wilkinson Sword disposables and Gilette Foamy, and it's a close enough shave that I only need to…

I've been shaving my head for over 20 years, and I've always just used regular razors and cream. Your scalp may…

Pretty much never. We love or hate Bungie, we love or hate Bioware, we love or hate EA, but we rarely care about the actual people involved.

Gale Ann Hurd is responsible, in one way or another, for much of what you love (or so I assume you love Terminator, Aliens, etc.)

You do know what "Dark Side" means, right?