Who the fuck isn’t playing in the NFL right now that you would want to see play football?

I was expecting vomit.

Haven’t we reached our quota of hot takes from old, roasted potato looking assholes this year?

At this point, it’s more like:

Benedict Beckeld’s brokenhearted boner.

# of binders full of women:

I think this is one of those areas that no one thought to legislate because what would be the odds that a petulant asshole would be elected president and do this kind of shit on a daily/weekly basis. Expect a ton of rule clarifications, refinements, and additions on presidential decorum in the first post-Trump year.

The motion carries. Time to start accepting bids for the cheapest bag of dicks we can find, across state lines if necessary.

And show even a flutter of weakness? Never. More than likely, they’ll hire someone to completely redo the fucking lighting.

The cynic in me fully believes the golden shower element to be a Russian counter intelligence story floated out there to cause most people to overlook the more fucked up allegations or dismiss the intelligence as a whole. And so far, it’s worked pretty fucking well.

Fucking steampunk goggles on his newsboy cap.

...and onnnnne pointy toy pig.

True. To be fair, he probably was holding a Quesalupa in his good hand.

Tower 7 Alert: He didn’t even have his belt fastened. He’s just another fat fuck guessing at what’s happening below the belly.