Good looking is a stretch, he looks like a Dr. Seuss character.

There’s a large group of people in Seattle who hope the Thunder never win another game. 

The St. Louis Cardinals called, and out of appreciation for your continued support and advocacy of “The Right Way” to play sports ball, would like to offer you an (unpaid) opportunity to help teach others the error or their ways.

USWNT better watch out the next time they have to face Madison Bumgarner.

That utterly makes no sense. Why would the Warriors risk an achilles injury on a player they hope to sign again? Why would they risk an injury on anybody?

KD’s injury sounds really bad, but not as bad as the song James Dolan is going to write about it. 

He was only slightly mistaken, the movie was the porn takeoff “The Dark Hole Knight”, and Kobe had dinner with the star to talk anal.

*Accountant, checking records* Charles, do you mean you ate a 100 Grand or ate 100 grand?

The Oregonian is absolute trash as a newspaper and deserves any scorn they get, no matter how petty.

The Oregonian has been shit for many years now...

As an Oregonian, I actually agree with this because the Oregonian is a trash right wing rag instead of what it used to be, which was Oregon’s paper of record

“Trust me, it’s a whole lot less effort with a tiny rubber white cock and a one-ball reservoir. Or, uh, so I’m told....”

So all this time my wife has been trying to pass a drug test?

That ball spent so much time on the rim Derek Jeter just proposed to it

A big reason why Paul George re-signed with OKC is that he can live out the rest of his salty ass life alone and away from the city in the sprawling Oklahoma mansion that Russ built for him for free, brick by brick.

No wonder LeBron got rid of Walton, he’s clearly a Kobe guy. 

gonna be fun when Giannis forces a trade in a few years and changes his name and then becomes the all time leading scorer in NBA history

This one incident covers so much of what is wrong the the NHL and exposes their half-hearted attempt at curtailing head injuries.

In defense of Jeter, he has slept with a lot of really hot women.