Good lawd. Headline:

Hey, here’s a funny anecdote: The name of his song is “Antidote”.

Yikes. Looks like someone’s getting a stocking full of ratios this Christmas.

A more callous person would say his analogy doesn’t have a leg to stand on...

Ah. So, this is the car that should have been in Kanye’s “Flashing Lights” video:

Humbly submitted for your approval: Sizzaltines.

HA!! OK, you’ve inspired me: This holiday season, I’m donating Douglas Adams’ paperbacks & single-malts. Surely some Chicagoland food bank or Goodwill is willing to turn a blind eye, stock the shelf and deck the halls.

I like your style. We’re gonna be friends.

Nice, and happy holiday tipples to you! BTW, the cream portion of Sheridans is white chocolate-based, so it’s got you covered. (Honestly, liquor is the only acceptable use of white chocolate). Just pop a thumb over the dark-side spigot and enjoy.

If your bottle of cordials has been hanging around for 2+ years, then it’s probably just not a cordial you enjoy. Feel free to toss it sans guilt...

My heart screams NP — if only to wrench on it next to my 92-X, showing it what true Saabdom looks like — but reason whispers softly: ND.

Maybe it’s just that my cup of fuckshit hath runneth over, but maybe before her mediation, maybe Mlle. Evans should, um, catch some hands?

If some enterprising Brit doesn’t spin this into a garishly-packaged product called Yay-O-Rings which are just funnelcake-style powdered onion rings, then I’m calling dibs, ®, ©, ™, or whatever.

Much respect for going with the Chicago-based Sears option. There was also some significant shuckin’ power to be found in the ‘72 NuTone and RonCo products; the former of which required the same leaded 88-octane mix as an Evinrude 25202R outboard motor, and the latter of which had a foot-actuated carburetor and the…

Butterscotch, chupacabra, vapors; and Godspeed, Michael.

How does Florida, the third-most populous US state, have no inspection reqs? Jacksonville alone must have the world’s preponderance of flood cars, junkers losing whole wheel assemblies on the highway, and salt-eaten shitboxes littering alleyways. Guess Florida stays too busy constantly badgering the rest of the states…

Excellent reference, and I’m sure just the first of many rock-band retrofits, a la:

Purdue, eh? I dunno, I’d have expected a more steam-powered solution out of them. Maybe let Middle Tennessee State U give it a shot...

Yikes. 8-year-old this dude is screaming “Ma, look, I made it! I made it! Wait ‘til Dad comes back with his smokes!”

Can confirm from SW Lake County: Vernon Hills is still solid — speed & quality are well-balanced, and access is easier than Golf Road (Schaumburg). Depending on where the day takes us, there’s usually a Portillo’s in play and en route.