Or, as my lot would say, innit! Top one mate, y’know what I mean?

Huzzah!

... and these are the people currently in power. I’m currently waking up every morning, woefully scanning the news on my phone before I dare step foot out of bed, and uttering…

We do! If it helps with imagining the joy of just how awesome our lexicon is IRL, I have a BAF (broad as fuck) Manchester accent so it’s “can’n beh arssssss’d” (I can’t remember my phonemes. One wasted degree there...).

Whilst relieved we’re not facing the possibility of being led by an English sheepdog with impulse control issues, the other contenders to the throne (one who is attempting to do away with the human rights act, another who thinks homosexuality is a disease that can be “cured”, another a straight up shitstain who’s…

I often ponder the usefulness of huge mansions.

I still laugh over “Hurricane Bawbag”.

YES! A very important phrase, as well as “trapping off” and to “pull”.

We still haven’t quite gotten over the whole tea debarcle.

Cheers! I have my wibbles, but I think that’s normal. I own shit things by taking the piss out of them, it keeps me sane!!!

Cripes, how’s the recovery from the op going? I hope you’re up and bimbling about!

We don’t have cops, we have coppers.

I finally got the results of the biopsy of the lump I found on my thyroid on Thursday, after originally finding it in November and being fobbed off then referred as “non-urgent” by my original GP.

He gave racists a thinly veiled acceptable front for their racism, and they bought every single lie that fell out of his face. I have very little hope for the human race after this shitcan got his way at the expense of the rest of the country.

A woman murdered her fiancé?

weighs just one of of his 13 years of decisions too heavily

One thing that struck me given some of the subjects covered in the show was Lolly’s Billy Cosby rape joke. It struck as missing the target of thought provoking humour and landing smack bang in tasteless.

It’s like the Graeae for criminals, instead of one tooth and one eye between them, it’s a gun. Only one at a time can be gangster.

It looks possible that she might be aiming for a punishment worse than jail in revealing his true nature. Given the past rumours of his violent outbursts were never confirmed and his exs stayed silent, the big, loud, unavoidable statement from someone who isn’t folding under pressure might be seen as a death knell for…

He’s not so handsome these days, either the spell has broken or there’s not enough contouring in the world to fill up a face bloated from years of substance abuse.