I had to take an Animal Rights Law class in college (shut up, I needed a law credit and it fit my schedule), and I read some interesting stuff about how, in general, great apes like gorillas have the cognitive capacity of a three or four-year-old human child. So, if that's true, then you have to consider the…

Confession: I stand to wipe. Also, I am female. I don't know why I do this other than I just do and I have literally never put thought into it before ever until this moment. I think it sounds super weird to wipe while sitting! You have to bend and reach around while still on the toilet?? Why would you do that?

I'm inagining that this entails one of those big flip-over-number signs a la "THIS WORKPLACE IS 001 DAYS ACCIDENT-FREE!" only for how many Ebola infections there are, and that it's huge and located in front of your state capitol building. And that there's a guy standing next to it with the big stick for flipping the…

Sweet, I'm making more than I should be based on the salaries for everything on this list that can loosely be considered my job.

My boss is a dude, and he's pretty awesome. His boss is also a guy, who is pretty cool. But that guy's boss? Badass lady who runs our whole company.

Came down here just to see if soneone had already made this point, and you did, so thank you!!

"Jesus Tapdancing Christ on a Cracker!!"

"Retrospectively Alarming Fanfiction" is going to be the title of my memoir.

I read this whole thing in the voice of a movie trailer narrator, and it was awesome. "In a world..."

I do this too. Several months ago I ordered a few delivery pizzas when I had friends over and we tipped the driver 20%, what I thought was the standard amount. He got wide-eyed looking at the receipt and thanked ms profusely for such a wonderful tip like I had given him $100 or something. I had to double check the…

If the writer had used male pronouns and a woman in the comments pointed it out (even in the most innocent and friendly way), you would tell her to chill out because the male pronouns aren't meant literally, it's just the standard default pronoun. Male pronouns are just always used as the generic.

Well. I think I speak for everyone here when I say NOPE NOPE NOPITY NOPE NOPE.

Ha! That's hilarious. I want to go to your Caucasian Town.

You just gave me an idea:

Your screenname is killing me, because it reminds me of how my sister used to have a BFF with the same first name in high school and my dad would call them "Sarah and Sarah 2: Electric Bugaloo." It eventually got shortened to just Bugaloo and resulted in such sentances as "Sarah's at the mall with Bugaloo" and "Ask…

Yes! That's what everyone seems to be missing from this movie: Nick is a monumental douche, but Amy is a complete psychopath. Like, a literal psychopath.

I saw Gone Girl and came into it with literally zero knowledge of the plot other than "Ben Affleck's wife disappears." I knew it was a super popular book with a twisty plot, so I intentionally tried to avoid any and all spoilers or mentions of the plot in any way.

Can we talk about how this school is called Devil's Lake High School?! What, are they on a Hellmouth or something? Sounds like the relative sluttyness of students' clothes should be the least of their worries. Maybe they should implement a dress code that includes silver crosses and strings of garlic, instead.

For some reason I'm getting Merle from Walking Dead (Michael Rooker) from this guy, which makes me excited and yet concerned for the puppies.

Oh man, the flannel is what cinches it for this one. This cabbie can get it because I love me some flannel.