I have no trouble believing he doesn’t use many racial slurs.

I’ve been told The Parthenon is mighty old. 

McDonalds has tried and failed a few times to even make a simple veggie burger work (they might have one now.) Going too far beyond vaguely Mexican and vaguely Asian with their dippin’ sauce and salad dressing is a tough sell to most of the USA

I like to think if Nimoy was unable to make it to the beach that day I could have covered for him singing “The Legend of Bilbo Baggins.”

This seems like a role that should be reserved for the somewhat odd-looking and vaguely nonsexual, kinda like Nimoy. I don’t know what to do with a hot and buff Spock. That’s like going to see a hot and buff income tax preparer or something, there should be no sexiness involved.

I don’t think these Grunge jokes are landing.

You’re just one of those Ticketmaster thugs spreading fake Grunge news.

That sounds better than my upcoming McDonalds scam movie about people filling their free water cups with Sprite.

Grunge isn’t about playing massive shows at major league ballparks named after insurance conglomerates. It’s about the music, man. The music, and selling surplus flannel shirts after the Northwest logging industry suffered massive cutbacks. 

As a longtime connoisseur of The Blues as interpreted by pasty and corpulent Baby Boomers I have to say this is certainly not Jim Belushi caliber, but I do appreciate the effort. 

Frank Oz got banned for a week for this Tweet. Evidently the Twitter censors had never seen the phrase “I owe you an apology” used on their service before and thought it must be something nefarious. 

Well, since we’re both here and it’s Friday night and I have a 6-pack of Smirnoff Ice...

If a Muppet Archivist says that’s the case you’d better believe it. Those guys go through 12 grueling years of postgraduate school before they can even touch a Brian Henson muppet. 

There’s no shortage of Millennials named Chris. Just replace them with Chris Pratt and Chris Evans. 

Perhaps they could get Irvin Kershner?

I say the next James Bond should go against every preconceived notion. Rita Moreno or GTFO. 

I think we all know the hijacker D.B. Cooper was actually The Cutting Edge’s D.B. Sweeney.

I predict the idea of moving the ceremony a few weeks earlier will be dropped. The Oscars thrive on weeks of buzz and free publicity in the entertainment media ahead of time.. Won’t that be overshadowed if they’re only a week after the Super Bowl?

Fired goons?

I guess the role of Kylo Ren’s dad was taken but maybe they could get Schwimmer in the next Star Wars as his loser uncle or something. The resemblance is just too uncanny not to.