Hey Steeler fans in between Browns fans and Lions fans: go fuck yourselves.

Far from the first time that a dick has been on full display in Downtown Chicago.

i suport offcer willson becaus hes a hero who stood up to to the "thug" culturre thats killing americas familys and homes. daron needs my support in ths difclt time because ofthe rampent naimals walking our streets and permeeating our schools. if officer like Wilson didnt put michael "brownback" in his place who…

"After 60 years of supporting the blacks I give up."

"What if I trade you this autographed ball for your number?"

Hall of Fame player there. Going after that pop up like a beer league softball player...

This doppelgänger is getting robbed. The Braves are paying a shit ton of money for a BJ Upton look alike to hang out in their starting lineup.

This is how I know that Lovie Smith is taking this team in the wrong direction. A real Schiano Man would never reflect.

"That's a Bryce Harper question bro"

That's his horrible gnarled hand. TELL ME THAT'S HIS HORRIBLE GNARLED HAND!

And sometimes it can take decades to pick out the right name, just ask Fausto Carmona.

Technically, all MLB players are previously unnamed until birth, and sometimes until several days afterwards.

Holy shit! Another minor league game went 16 innings last night!?

Ahh.. I see you've played Scully / Screwy before. Nicely done.

Just checking to see if I'm following this correctly... Your handle is "RIP DJ SCREW" and you believe Vin Scully is overrated? Am I right so far?

You know what else is overrated? Ice cream, and cookies, and chocolate, and chocolate cookie ice cream, and sex with women, and men, and sex with women and men while eating chocolate cookie ice cream. Everyone likes them for BS reasons.

No no no, you misunderstood. He'd serve him if he had to, but in general he just wouldn't let him into his bar.

Christ. That would be one hell of a party trick.

I mean, this is kind of why it's so great. It's hard to do! The hitter presumably knows he runs the risk of looking foolish and does it anyway. Either that, or he's too mad to care.

I love that he wastes so much time with tough-guy posturing, too. He makes sure we know he'll kick an ass if it touches one of his female possessions, though said possession could save him the trouble by rethinking her tone before it gets that far.