" Beyonce is likely the finest living performer we have right now and she proved that again tonight."

I feel like I've made my contribution for the day...

I can agree that 7 is too old, but lots of kids walk and talk before they're one, and I don't think that means they're cut off, you know?

The cock story reminds me of when my uncle was a general manager at an Applebee's. He was doing his rounds, going to different tables and checking on customers. He then walks up to a table with two men and blurts out, "And how are you fucks doing this evening?" He had meant to say, "folks." One of the guys burst out…

There was a couple who used to come into my job and order the same steaks and they were never, ever, cooked to their liking. Ever. They always sent them back and always complained to a manager.
One day I was managing and a server told me that the "steak people" were here and that they wanted to talk to me. I went over…

Sexually harrassing a guy on the street without internet outcry... Must be Female privilege.

Psst - she's pointing out that the article is misspelling the name of the acid.

"Vindictive and mean spirited?" To factually recall an experience they had where they don't use the names of anyone involved? It's completely harmless.

"... robbed the place with a machete two weeks later." <—-funniest statement in this entire article.

A hell full of gays and drunks sounds way better than a heaven full of reality stars. (Thieves won't be good company but at least they won't have much to steal.)

Sensationalized headlines used to make not-so-life-or-death stories sound like its LITERALLY LIFE OR DEATH is lame click baity garbage used to drive eyes to stories that don't deserve it.

I've noticed quite recently that in all of my relationships, I have never been the one to initiate sex. I would be quite happy in a sex-less relationship. I don't think that it's a libido issue, because I masturbate quite frequently, but having actual sex with another person doesn't really intrigue me.

I saw American Hustle and I wish I had not.

If we made the banknotes entirely out of Spandex it'd be easier to make our money stretch.

Did she really not foresee this happening??

People need to slow their roll. This national Beyonce obsession is getting out of control.

Are all dog people this sensitive? Cheesus. My cat hits me all the time, they don't use their claws to bat you. If they really wanted to hurt the dogs they could've in the 10 minutes that the dog stood right there in front of them freaking out. If the dogs were really that afraid, they would run away.

Never has it been more explicit why I am a cat person. This video should be attached to my CV or something. Also, cats can be patient. See?

Off topic: I love that episode :)

Listen, I'm happy to give up soda, alcohol, television, endless web surfing and all my other vices. The minute we adopt national policies to relieve the stress and misery induced by my 60 hour-a-week desk monkey job working for corporate idiots. Where's that study, Science? When are you going to look into how mice…