5-2: stroke.

It’s Alabama, they just get angry if you suggest terminating the nest before nine months but after that forget about it...

Drumpf would say it’s an unplayable lie and kick the ball into the fairway. Unplayable lie is basically his entire administration ironically enough.

No, the WHITE phone!

Why don’t we call voting for Biden in the General Election “Plan B.”

Yes. But that doctor was employed by the Golden State Warriors. 

States were voted in to the Union, why can’t we vote them out?

Arachno’s pest control. You got mice? We’ll get rid of them. You got kids, we’ll get rid of them too. Hell we’ll get rid of you too at no extra charge. You’re welcome.

citation needed

Right-Wing Nutjob Aborts Full-Term Baby in Public

God bless Dave Bautista. By all accounts, he’s a gentle giant, except when he deals racist, sexist nazis.

Flight Attendant: And something to drink sir?

You’d think he, of all people, would heed Nancy Reagan’s advice to Just Sano.

Bye bye Miss American Pie drove my Ford to the Fjord but the Fjord was dry.

I respectfully disagree. All dogs are awesome because they are not people.

Own your shit, republican cowards.

I’m Actually Laughing at How Little Trump’s Campaign Cares About the Law

Last thing Magic needed was more aids working against him. 

Pretty Biased, I’d say.

You EXPECT something? Eat a bucket of fucks you shit eating dickhead!