Wow. You must be her doctor.

Oh, that’s nice. “Visibly overweight?” Simply adorable. She looks like an average-sized American woman to me. Look at the actual people around you and less at what you’re fed through the media and you’ll see.

My (inner) response to when my dad says, “If we can get Trump in the whitehouse,”:

This is crazy. How many more times can I read something that disgusts me more than the day before???

Donald Trump. Donald Trump Jr. Eric Trump. Corey Lewandowski. Mike Pence. Roger Ailes. Bill O’Reilly. Steve Doocey. Sean Hannity. Josh Duggar. Bill Cosby. Literally millions of others...

I’m beginning to understand why countries break apart and civil wars happen, because I really, really don’t want to live in the same country as these people.

Not sure if this was part of the original script for Patrick Bateman in American Psycho.

the GOP let the horse out of the barn a long time ago but only now is closing the doors. Except it wasn’t really a horse, but a mangy goat covered in rotten marmalade who thinks he’s a unicorn.

So deeply “religious,” yet they commit all sorts of crimes against women, their communities and their government, while blatantly flouting the tenets of the god they claim to serve.

It continues to amuse/irritate me to no end that these people - white, conservative, religious - are the real face of welfare fraud. Not saying that other people don’t cheat the system but the FLDS have turned welfare fraud into an art form. Yet somehow when some people use the term ‘welfare queen’ you just know the…

“We have a bunch of talented, creative females, but they reach a certain point in their careers ... “

Yeah stop trying to make me like you, Megyn Kelly

The fact that I am finding joy and solidarity in something Kelly does makes me even angrier at Trump. She’s awful... but war rules of “the enemy of my enemy is my friend” seem to apply here. Yes. I’m going with that.

That’s the kind of face you normally see after hundreds of years of aristocratic in-breeding. I’ve seen a plate of mashed potatoes with more distinction.

dear Jezebel, more movie reviews from Jane Marie please. Pay any price

this baby nero looks like he’d slit my throat to use my blood as rouge. no.

i’m a pacifist but i felt some legit french revolution stirrings upon viewing the instagram account of this modern-day dandy.

I’m getting a strong “wannabe Winona Ryder” vibe.

She certainly seems to have every side of the fence covered.