"What's that, little girl? You want butter? Fuck you! If I had 12 rupees to spend on butter, I'd hold out for 8 more so I can actually sleep in a goddamn bed for once!"

I wound up sitting at a fire through my first two (two!) Blood Moons.

There's nothing worse than seeing three rain icons in a row on your little weather thingy.

Mirror pics, mostly.

I don't imagine you have to drop everything very often.

More beer?

Yeah, I feel like Pixar's MO is more accurately described by not hanging their conflicts on a clear villain if they can help it. It's not like Sid or Hopper or Randall or Charles Muntz have anything particularly endearing about them.

That's too expensive.

None of the three are slouches, but "Belle" should have won.

What I adore about Gaston - I don't know if this supports the article's assertion that he's a shallow character or not, just that I love it - is that you learn everything you need to know about him from his first line.

But what if I need it!?!?

That was part of the dream reenactment, right?

Oh, I'm constantly overflowing with weapons. Every day I drop at least two or three things because whatever's in the chest I just opened is better.

I don't really have the rupees, sadly.

Weird, this Clickhole article somehow got posted as a GJI.

Sometimes wheat or rice, which can be used to make valuable recipes.

I had a decent advantage, because if you can track down the complete set of rubber armor, you become immune to electric attacks. I waltzed in there going "Nah nah, you can't hurt me!" and the Lizalfos proceeded to spit me to death instead.

That's one thing I really love about this game. Other Zeldas - which I also love - would almost certainly have a plot-crucial character tell you "Go visit the Great Dragon who lives at the top of this mountain; he will give you the power you need to access your next challenge."

There are a few things that make it a bit more forgiving - Korok leaves, for instance, have infinite use as long as they don't make contact with anything mid-swing, torches can be set on fire as many times as you like without burning away, and thank God, cutting grass doesn't count as 'using' a weapon. Sledgehammers…

Story that's only kind of a story: