Geez. If I’m gonna spend 12 minutes with a dog licking ass I’m gonna need a lotta peanut butter.

If I was stuck talking to you at a party, I would pull of all my fingernails and then shove them down your throat so that you drowned from my blood, simply to combat the tedious inanity.

Not the first time a German has decided to lay his hands on the nether lands. Or as we call them now, the Löw countries.

Today in Alternate Future History:

This is a hobby horse of mine. That reputation - of not being a competent president - is almost entirely propaganda nonsense generated by Lost Causers-people sympathetic and supportive of the Confederacy who have spent every second since Appomattox clouding the reasons for the war and slandering everyone in the North.

Well, SMU DID cover up the murders of 5 dead hookers.

Someone in the comments covered this one way back when...if they really want the statue back, let them make some modifications:

Let’s compromise and erect a statue of Sandusky molesting a boy while Paterno watches.

Until I hear it from Selena Gomez I'll just assume he can't ball.

I preferred Steamroller myself. One kid rolls from side to side across the trampoline while the other 7-8 kids have to jump over him. Fall or get shoved on him, and you’re the Steamroller now, punk. Fighting ensues.

Is that supposed to look like a USB outlet because they’re the Chargers?

Thanks for the compliment! :)

I’ll throw this in there for some color and add that it should be more than a couple playoff games. That comes out to about a 10 game suspension in the league’s eyes....five of which likely won’t matter at all because the Hawks are Central#3 with a 4-point+tiebreaker buffer both up the standings and down. Not enough.…

Not content with only offending American Indians, Dan Snyder actually employs a Cooley to do his heavy lifting.

Pulling for Jay and Dan, they deserve better.

In Peyton’s defense, Papa John probably tastes better than his pizza.

This isn’t Darwinism. This is teenaged boys and their teenaged brains at work. Most of us escape our teen years having done something stupid that could have killed us. It’s a sad story and the fact that these boys were brothers compounds that tragedy.

Ted Cruz: Duck Hunt is, at least, phonetically accurate.

The same could be said about the entire state of Utah

Glad Bettman is handling the appeal, though. That way, he’ll be in the same room as Wideman, hear his defense right from the source, and look him directly in the bellybutton to determine if Wideman is telling the truth.