I know Woody and Bongo aren't going to let any woman be cast that they don't consider fuckable, but I wish they would at least cast someone that can do a Louisiana or Texas accent. Take notes from Justified gentlemen, all those ladies are beautiful but also totally believable as Kentuckians.

Make one for the ladies! Pretty please with a cherry on top!!

Yep, that's them! I used to work as a bartender and life was hell when I had a stress break out. Lemons, bleach, god! I wanted to cut off my hands with the serrated garnish knife! My current dermatologist gave me 2 creams to use together: clindamycin & desonide. They have worked the best but don't knock it out…

So I see my grandmother's bridge club is working for Facebook now! Evil. Pure Evil.

Can you tell me more about your stress bumps on your fingers and how you use the coconut oil? I get those too and I've been to 5 dermatologists, none of whom knew what they were or what to do about them. I've tried a dozen or more creams/remedies and nothing has worked. I will totally be your best friend for life…

Do not fret my pet. I seriously doubt that McDonald's guacamole will have any avocado (as we know it in nature) in it.

There was a great pizza delivery place in my neighborhood that was run by a bunch of stoners. One night they asked me if I wanted some magic brownies with my order. Magic? Hell yeah! I was so sad when I realized it was just a plain ole delicious brownie :(

Agreed. I think the problem is that people don't want any reality to mess with their ideal. If you show the bones, the cellulite, or anything else that happens on a normal body (thin or not) they will reject it. It really does show how far we have devolved into our Photoshopped world.

Okay, I have to tell my Bradley Cooper story now. I live in LA and it's not odd for me to run into famous people at Trader Joes. This was about 4 years ago. I was shopping at TJs one day and this guys kept leering at me. I ignored him because he looked like a famous person being a pompous fool, complete with…

But it's okay for the teenage boys to wear this to school. These tatted up Marilyn shirts have become insanely popular with high school. And this is a tame one.

There was a guy at my high school who didn't want to take his science final, so he set the classroom on fire. Of course, being a science classroom it exploded. He never had to take that final though, because he ended up in jail (he was 18). Darwin award finalist.

This is what 40 looks like. BOOM! The 40s are a wonderful decade for women.

Me too! Happy birthday to us and also to Queen Elizabeth!

Have a couple of snakebites and rip their disapproving heads off. They'll change their minds.

At work today, eating a muffin and pretending it's a cupcake. Drinking limeade and pretending it's a margarita. Sigh. It's going to be a long day.

See what happens when you date intelligent women George?

She will now and forever be Graceful Shade to me.

Oh hell no! Did I just see Tevos in that video? That is where I draw the line. Come on people, for the love of god, don't do it!

Good for them! I hope it catches on in the other hate states. I had my eyes opened recently to how hard gay couples have it in certain parts of America. I was on Tripadvisor looking for hotels and noticed a trending comment. "Everyone was welcoming" would pop up, set apart from the rest of the comment. I realized it…

And if it weren't for gerrymandering it would probably be legal to wed there, and perhaps even be a blue state. Thanks Karl Rove! (Sarcasm)