You can't eat Papa Johns Pizza for three years and not expect to shit the bed

They did get Jason Whitlock to sign up because of that last promo code.

Have to give FanDuel credit for finding this bearded guy to appear in their ads, who is repellently horrible as the product he’s representing.

Please if you are having suicidal thoughts or just struggling with depression talk to a friend or call the suicide prevention hotline. They’re there to help: 1-800-273-8255.

And even if the bunt succeeds.....THEY FUCKING WALK HARPER BECAUSE THEY’RE NOT MORONS. Probably intentionally, but at least pitch around him with as much if not more caution than they did.

If you try to run a trick play while the defense plays with 10 men to honor a dead teammate, this deserves to happen to you.

Bold statement.

Pro tip 2: Don’t get old. Those mildly annoying hangovers at 23 become a death sentence at 33.

Barber: What kind of look are you going for, bud?

I don’t know how to say this tactfully. What’s the distinction between receiving a nose job, having liposuction, getting breast implants, etc? Does the magnitude of the perceived backlash make it more courageous? The CEO of United Therapeutics was transgender, and didn’t receive this type of praise or attention. I…

Question: If a team decides they want to kick a PAT and then there’s a penalty so they decide to go for two, would the penalty be enforced from the 15 or would they start from the 2 and enforce the penalty from there? Also what happens in an opposite situation (going for 2 and a penalty then deciding to go for 1)?

It can be reviewed in New York. Everything should be now, instead of forcing the on-field official to delay the game that much longer. In this case, there was plenty of on-field discussion before the flag was picked up, so that whole time (theoretically), a review official could review that which game officials can't…

Damn, I'll issue a correction.

I don't get this whole "We need to hurry this game up!" thing. I have never in a million years thought to myself "Boy these guys are taking forever." I have however said "Why the fuck is the World Series starting at 8:30 PM?" Even the Super Bowl starts at 6:30 PM.

It appears they are, indeed, counting everyone who has liked their Facebook among their "online activists." There is no other metric by which they could measure anything.

Aaaaand I just realized that Fowler and Davis aren't the same guy.

That's mildly disturbing at first glance.

The general consensus here in Seattle is that was indeed a terrible call.

If there's one thing that helped me more than anything with my substance abuse problems it was losing my job. Good job NFL.

Under the League's understanding of what constitutes alcohol and marijuana abuse, I've been a raging junky unfit for work since I was seventeen years old.