Thank you :) I know logically that's the right answer, it's just hard to believe it from myself sometimes! He got with her right after we broke up so was obv stalking me while with her... I don't think he's changed, really.

Yeah! I think he got married pretty quick too - I just was good about not googling until recently! Ugh mistake. When I think he probably hasn’t changed (from my googling I do think that’s the most likely scenario even though there's a big part of me that thinks it was my fault) I then just want to write her and say…

So I found out recently my abusive ex has a wife and kid, and I can’t stop being bothered by it. The relationship was years ago and I’m definitely over it (if not the trauma) but he was violent, extremely controlling and terrifying. By the end of it there wasn’t one aspect of my life he didn’t control and critique. I…