He can leave via exorcism for all I care. Just get out 

Pffffft prepare for your untimely demise at the hands of seven million sharp-toothed Swiftian Maenads, bro. You messed with the fans. Big mistake. Huge.

“It merely required no character."

The tourists always give themselves away!

Whistle whistle whistle! I'm on pins and needles to know what today will bring after Schiff lays into the IG.

HE DOESN’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT POLLUTION OR THE HOMELESS. HE’S DISTRACTING YOU.

2001 was 20 years ago.

Derpy hooves xD

Okay, THAT is an apology. No punches pulled. Internet, take notes.

+1 duck and smile kabuki

+1 dimwitted wall of gluttony

Badabing.

File To: OYY, GEVALT

*APPLAUSE*

Small blessings = navy blue

Not in Mountain View-- that’s 2 hamberders + tip.

omg I adore this video btw

They’re to bribe the grocery store cashier in case he forgets his ID when he goes to buy cereal.

Most excellent! I remember reading about this ritual in Marianne Faithfull’s memoir a long, long time ago. She was this clueless smacked-out 20-year-old junkie in the late ‘60s, who didn’t know anything about Brazil or anything about Bahia (where they were camping)... she hadn’t a clue about the celebration’s name…

I type it like I tawk it.