I accidentally skipped ahead and missed the whole “pick one side” bit, but here’s my submission anyway.
We can have more Please Monkeys. We can always have more Please Monkeys.
I got a Razer Naga Chroma, combining 3 of my favorite things- LEDs, buttons, and incredibly high DPI that makes people go “how do you even use your computer?”
UPDATE: I got rid of the mildly spoiler-y picture in case someone incidentally stumbles across it.