Come to Scotland but skip Edinburgh aside from mebbe a wee jaunt to something at the festival. There are no Scottish people left in Edinburgh, having largely been displaced by tourists, international students on the equivalent of their gahp yah, and hopeful touring comedy troupes.

‘Back of the line’ implies that there is a line, and something exists at the back of it. There is no line. There is no back. There’s a set of criteria to be met by candidate states, most of which Scotland has been meeting as part of the United Kingdom since 1973.

You know there isn’t an actual queue, right? Scotland would join a group of around half a dozen countries (http://europa.eu/newsroom/highlights/special-coverage/enlargement_en) attempting to meet the entry criteria for EU membership. As Scotland has been quite happily meeting those criteria for several decades I…

My two wee brain cells just can’t stop belly-laughing at the truly staggering irony of the paragraph: ‘as to how they square the circle of wanting to leave the functional democratic state in which they are if anything significantly overrepresented, but are up in arms about leaving a dysfunctional and rather…

No BBC reboots here I’m afraid - Humans is a Channel 4/AMC production. The Beeb tends to shit the bed when confronted with contemporary technology-based drama.

My own wee country is doing its best in the current climate of gigantic FuckYouism. It would be nice if some of my Scottish co-habitees would stop sabotaging the shit out of every effort made to stay in Europe and live happier existences, but I suppose you can’t have everything .

It’ll only be stupid for a year or so. In the UK it’s not unusual for even small shops to have a contactless reader with a £30 transaction limit. No PIN, takes about 4 seconds for a store with a reasonable internet connection to verify.

+1 for grabbing hold of very wee and unbelievably difficult-to-access cables, wires and electrical components. Hemostats (with locking jaws) are *amazingly* useful.