So much better than Billy...

Although I guess that’s not saying much.

We’re not going to win the title or anything, but we sure won’t be boring this season.

blah blah blah MLS is a ponzi scheme and is garba....oh wait, Billy didn’t write this.

I love these articles but being a Patriots fan it’s always such a bummer having to wait so long for you guys to get to them.

It’s cool to see an older player still developing his game this late in his career. The Kings knew they were signing a great rebounder and post scorer, but now they’re getting a distributor too.

Et tu, Vertu?

Pictured: The light of Day

63 Earths can fit in Uranus.

As opposed to the teams in Europe, who are owned by saints with nothing but compassion in their heart.

“MLS is bad because it’s structured to avoid financial collapse that befall clubs in Europe and isn’t designed to push power and wealth to the very top clubs.

“Testing themselves at Stoke City” is rather breathtaking in its obliviousness.

“MLS sucks because all the players are bad”

Billy I think you’ve done it. You’ve finally written your worst piece on deadspin. You should be proud

I think the MLS may have fucked Billy’s mom.

Their hitting coach Turner Ward, whom Puig kisses on the cheek after every HR would be a good place to start.

Cardinals fans.

Bob Ryan paid her the best compliment, which is she is the only person in her field who could call college and pro, men’s and women’s, as well as she does.

you’re shit out of luck if you’re someone with hips, boobs, or generally shaped in a less tube-like manner

I always list how many beers I can pound in an hour.

Old Luke is upset about all these Millenial Falcons.