If Dan Marino had played hockey:

The look on his face is just priceless, just dreed because he knows this will be all over the internet and likely what he will be best known for, the guy who scored a butt goal. 

Today I learned: Sáček is the Czech equivalent of Sanchez.

I knew that comment would have a swift and severe backsplash.

An inexperienced coach needs a reliable brain trust around him.

Freddy Kitchens sinks even lower.

Gave you my star, grayboy.

“I told you this would happen if you touched my butt one more time.”

That’s just how a Scarlet Knight celebrates after he has just scored.

You sweet summer child. 

I think “pulling off the ol’ double moochy” is what got him into trouble in the first place.

🐀🐀🐀🐀🐀
🐀🐀🐀🐀🐀🐀🐀
🐀🐀🐀🐀🐀

I can’t believe the Patriots went to all this trouble to beat the Dolphins.

NFL: here is a bajillion dollars. All you have to do is not be a despicable moron for few years, we good?

Though not the saddest Natalie Wood story.

*Reads story*

Well at least now we know what happened to Natalie Wood.

Once again, a soccer story that ends with no scoring.

That’s making a lot of very generous assumptions about McCain (that she can follow directions, that she’s self-aware enough to build a character, that she isn’t ridiculously thin-skinned and petty) that I’m not sure is warranted.

“I can’t see straight.”