If they did that, it would be super awkward at work - what would they say when they’re in an elevator with Mitch? Really uncomfortable.

“Mexican rapists are stealing jobs from American rapists”

Let our elected officials vote on impeachment so we can see EXACTLY where each of them stand on corruption in our highest office.

Well, Reagan should have gone to prison, too. 

It is a well-known fact that people with racist views cannot possibly have an ongoing sexual relationship with someone outside of their own racial or ethnic group. It is so much a fact, that there exist absolutely no counterexamples in history.

Wait, what game were we playing again?

Look, if they want a better job, they should buy more money.

Haven’t you heard? Those workers have no skills and therefore deserve no respect.

“These guys are going to work like we do every day and all they want to feel respect and appreciation, and when you go to work and you don’t feel either one of those, you get depressed...” Gerard said about the NYPD.

You’ve obviously never felt the fear of walking down the ethnic foods aisle. 

Wy would you do a thing like that? The only difference between rural PA and Alabama is the weather. And I am certainly not moving to Alabama. There's not enough money in the world. 

It is illegal to present a falsified National Weather Service report. BUT! I think that only applies when the country follow laws and stuff.

Pam went to Pratt art school. Highly unlikely that she’d be a conservative.

 It's like knockoff Chris Pratt. 

I mean, if I have a couple hours after work and so I take a part time job at McDonalds working a few hours a couple nights a week, I get paid the minimum wage of $15+ an hour, get paid sick leave, unemployment benefits, et cetera.

Honestly, if both companies cannot figure out how to pay their employees minimum wage and survive, then I guess it turns out that they were just shitty businesses running an illegal taxi service on VC money. They were doomed to failure anyway and ending their misclassification of their workers just hastened their…

These coal-mining companies are like 100 years old. Literally what thought did these parents put into this? If you don’t like being a 12-year old working in the mines, don’t work in the mines. God, I’m tired of kids within missing limbs complaining about their working conditions.

There’s a pretty plausible theory making the rounds on Twitter than Trump’s dementia has advanced significantly, and his handlers are reducing his public appearances as much as possible, which is why Pence got sent abroad. The theory says the G7 conference overtaxed him, and fatigue is exacerbating his incoherence. Thi…

The thing is, he could have just kept his mouth shut, and everyone would have forgotten it. But he keeps bringing it up, because he cannot accept that he was wrong.

You do realize that all the Abrahamic religions pray to the same G-d right? The Jews, Christians and Muslims all report to the same head office.