Looks like somebody forgot to put the transmission in Bark.

God damn it. Stick to sports and stop talking about the MLS!

No, don’t play fantasy. A New England fan.

“...and here are just some of the potential trajectories your car might take after it flies off the road. You can go in a squiggly line bouncing off of rocks and trees. Or, my personal favorite, straight off a cliff Wile E. Coyote style.”

A horse drawn carriage? But what if there were mares pulling it?

Its a shame literally everyone who has ever ridden one of these was killed immediately because of their lack of exhaust noise.

Gravity finally gets its sweet revenge on Newton. 

For paying an extra $5 of allowance money, I let my kids choose their seats in the van (third row only, 28" seat pitch). And if they got a good progress report, I’ll even let them bring an extra carryon bag with guaranteed space (on the roof rack, that is).

In 3rd grade football, I was a center playing exactly the league mandated minimum of 3 downs per game. In an early game, I spaced out in the huddle and missed the snap call, was too nervous to ask for it again, and got our team 10 simultaneous false start calls. I never got much better.

“Some people are fans of the Los Angeles Chargers.”

Surprising to see him get the sack as an edge rusher; usually Peace comes from within.

Also, for Triscuit, I love the original myself, but the Smoked Gouda and the Rosmary Olive Oil ones are freaking amazing (so are the other flavors, but those two are the best)

Way more than 127 were still on the road.  127 is the number that made it home.

I’m a Lions fan living in NW PA. I took my family (including my 12 year old daughter) to the Lions/Bills game last year. Within 150ft of where we parked the car, she saw 2 keg stands and a drunken woman writhing in the mud. My wife gave me a furious look and all I could do was shrug my shoulders and mumble “Bills…

The Bucs suck so blandly they aren’t even the worst run pirate-themed NFL team to have hired Jon Gruden.

Speaking of people who have had rough times in Florida, they traded for Jason Pierre-Paul.