Holy shit. I picked something I thought was safe. Now I know what Ray Stantz felt like.

[gleefully eats lunch with wifi-enabled fork]

No conclusions yet, lettuce make up our own minds first.

“I'm a level-five vegan. I won't eat anything that casts a shadow.”

Maybe listen to him less; I have three kids at home as a result of listening to mine.

I just had a piece of chocolate cake and it was delicious.

How many assholes do we have on this ship, anyway?

"Real ketchup, Eddie?"
"Nothing but the best!"

wtf is Dawes lol

I've scrolling for what seems like hours and you're the first person I recognize. Let's just start using obscure inside jokes until everyone realizes how uncool we are and leaves.

She wouldn't tell him what the soup du jour was.

I've done it twice. Married the second one. Worked for me!

Fyre Festival sues Prometheus for giving us fire in the first place.

If yo plait the pun game, be ready for some folks to push limits.

He apologized? No whey. I don't believe it.

Bubbles? I want Lancelot Link: Secret Chimp.

Filthy? I thought people washing each other's feet was a thing for him and his followers?

And violence. Funny how those two things go hand-in-hand sometimes.

You do tend to buck commenting norms.

For the record, I hate SJP horse jokes, but I'll saddle up for a pun thread.