wear a badge identifying you as an adult who is there without a child

I do actually find this really surprising. I get where they're coming from, but even the local children's museum lets in adults. You just have to turn over your driver's license, and wear a badge identifying you as an adult who is there without a child, so that if anyone sees you with a child, they know it isn't…

Remember, please, that "end-of-life counseling" services, including counseling that could include outcomes like this, are the exact same things that were branded as death panels by Sarah Palin and her drone army.

I might have just fell in love with you.

Unless your day planner is decorated with penises you severed with your own nail file, forget it. You're not allowed into the club. The glitter was a nice touch and your qualifications are superb, but unless you're not willing to do the wet work, the Feminazi Hive Mind(tm) does not currently have use for your…

This doesn't have nearly enough stars at all. Let me pour some male tears on it, from a rinsed out gallon jug of unsweet tea.

THAT SOUNDS AMAZING

Please call the Feminist High Council at 1-800 KILL ALL MEN and press 666 for customer service. Provide your correct contact info and the FHC will be sure to rectify the situation and start making sure you get all the invites.

Mine was purple. The outrage edition.

Where did you get it? Is it pink? Does it have glitter? It doesn't matter, I want one.

Let the predictable, Lindsay bashing, "she looks older than Tina" comments commence.

Heh heh. You said "behind."

Not restaurant, but food related:

Once I was pretty high and decided to make a grilled cheese sandwich, and forgot to take the wax paper out from between the two slices of cheese that I used. I realized it about a third of the way in but didn't want my sandwich to go to waste so ate the rest of it. The texture kind of works in a grilled cheese, at…

I worked at a dinner theatre where we saw all kinds of weirdos. We had comment cards on each table and always followed up on any negative comments. We were serving a cedar planked salmon, and received the feedback "the bread under the salmon was too hard." There was a quick sort through the cedar planks, and sure…

Quelle roughage!

Fish in pastry would be 'en croute' not 'en papillote'. What a moron!

RANCH FEVER IS REAL, YA'LL. I worked at Denny's for a few years, and people would ask for cereal bowls full of ranch so frequently that I stopped being surprised after a few weeks. And the OP's dead on — it's ONLY ranch, nobody would do this shit with Honey Mustard or Catalina French. I assume Ranch Fever is a more…

I was JUST thinking "HEY IT MIGHT BE TIME FOR BCO" and then IT APPEARED.