Oh, that's beautiful. I tell all my friends who are planning weddings to get used to saying "I'm sorry you feel that way, but this is how we're doing things." Everyone has an opinion about how other adults should get married.

My Aunt and Uncle got married December 24,1969. People are STILL complaining about them getting married on Christmas Eve.

I can't speak for everyone, but I personally don't think it's my business how people choose to spend their money. And I really do think, in a lot of cases, spending six figures on a party is cultural, whether the person is part of the a wealthy, elite culture, or a latin culture where it's not uncommon to spend the…

I had a fancy-ass sweet sixteen too. It was fun. and I don't feel bad about it. I also own a house and together, we have 3 cars, all pretty new. We also took a great honeymoon. The money was really just a drop in the bucket for our benefactor- and don't you worry- they really do spend a ton on charity... way more than…

A lot of people who pay six figures for a party ALSO do the other things you mentioned. Doing one doesn't prohibit the other. Some people have a lot of money, get the fuck over it! And no, I'm not one. I'm poor white trash.

So many people say "black tie" when they really mean "look nicer than usual." People don't understand these terms have actual, specific meanings.

I actually want to invite you out for drinks because laughs and alcohol, and what even is with all this hate (for the haters - says the single mother phd student who grew up in government housing next to a meth lab and pot growers. and is still poor dammit. stupid academia). I had no idea you exerted influence both…

Do you think they had a cheap wedding, for real?

If that were the case- should bill gates live like an average middle class joe? He certainly doesn't NEED a multimillion dollar home... that could go to charity!

OMG. I went to a military ball once.. ."Black tie." The soldiers of course were dressed beautifully, because it's a uniform. The women. Lord almighty. I had even asked my date beforehand whether it was "real" black tie, and he had told me it was. And it was for him. My ball gown was... well, not right for the crowd.…

My god, people can be so nasty. I'm watching the replies to you with horror.

I didn't spend the money, nor was it my choice to. You can yell at my family, if you're really feeling angry about it, but they also donate an absolute fuckton to charity and the like. Way more spent on charity than my wedding. It's not even a close contest. My wedding was a drop in the bucket compared to the amount…

You remove them to eat! (Thanks for the education, Downton Abbey) The major problem is someone accidentally sloshing red wine on you while going in for an air kiss, speaking from experience!

Did you consider it doesn't mean anything to the people paying and that perhaps it's a drop in the bucket?

The last wedding I went to was morning dress, then a white tie reception. Seems like that'd make a few heads explode around here.

Yeah, I drew the line at the couple in the North Face gear myself. It probably would have been wise for the bride to have considered the crowd she was inviting. They were polite and wonderful people, but like a lot of folks nowadays don't, most of them didn't actually own formal clothing and weren't very comfortable…

You're a worse snob than plenty of people with money. And totally uncouth to boot. You know nothing about me, my family, or my husband.

Oh yeah. How dare you want to spend x amount of money on a stupid party? Well, unless I'm asking for donations or contributions, it's none of your business. It's ridiculous when people get sanctimonious over these things.

I think it's only selfish if the bride/groom have an issue if you don't attend. That's the deal you make when you ask your guests for an extra, like destination wedding, or black tie, or dressing for a theme wedding. You can invite whomever you'd like, but you have to be prepared for some to not participate.

Lol, I didn't spend 600k! I said six figures. That can range from 100k-999k. I was purposefully ambiguous about how much I spent.