Yeah, it's bad to give into demands. But I tempt my dog with treats to get him to stop yapping at shadows. But I think that just makes him yap at more shadows.

"I'm all for a woman making something out of nothing."

Feel better! Remember the good times your dog gave you and how you enhanced his/her life. Thinking of you!

Not sure why, but that sounds racist.

Yeah, but a part of me is wondering if she deserved it. They don't plaster hideous names on customer bills every day. Only for the truly awful ones.

They both look like nightmare people. Miss Runner Up couldn't accept the fact that not everyone likes her — can't imagine why — and Miss Yellow Dress wasn't even in the running so I don't know what she's so excited about unless it's to be Runner Up's lap dog.

Also,"Wu-pocalypse" doesn't make a goddamn shred of sense. It's almost as if he's operating with a severe mental issue.

I got mugged once in broad daylight as I was walking to my car after work. I guess I asked for it by going outside.

If I had a central role in boning/spawning/raising some of the most aggressively stupid people on this earth, I'd want to shed my identity in favor of an entirely new one, too.

You're very exotic-looking. Is your dad a GI?

They're the same way with cheerleaders. All cheerleaders are stupid spoiled brats. Every last one. Which is dumb because how many ex-cheerleaders does jezebel even have on staff? That's what I thought.

Pipe down.

I'm skeptical. In the ten years this show has been on, why hasnt anyone else spoken up? Also, a large amount of weight can be lost healthfully in a few months, but only in an extreme environment, which this is. Exercising is literally a part-time job for them on the ranch, and the calorie counting is enough to ensure…

Yeah. This comes across as unnecessary and annoying.

I don't know why someone would choose a career on the stage if they were *actually* afraid of performing in front of others. I think this is a piss-poor, transparent attempt to be "interesting" and "mysterious" when in reality it's a shoddy, tiresome, pretentious schtick.

Then we wouldn't have the herpetic kardashians.

That gimmick had the potential to be cute until...it wasn't. If you have to clarify that your bloody-heart-in-a-box joke is a joke, then you didn't execute the joke well.

This is my dream job.

That was so goddamn unnecessary. I muted most of it. I would've fast-forwarded but On Demand didn't let me. Assholes.

Dumb twat.