Stop the auto-play videos with sound already, I’m going to complain in every comment.

I shall invent a device that alerts Dolphins fans when they are being erroneously charged for purchases. It will emit a Dolphin-call shriek if a skimmer is used to rack up a fraudulent charge. I will call it “the Miami Sound Machine.”

I dare you to wave some sort of document in front of a woman a week post-partum and is going through hormonal upheaval, sore nipples, and extreme exhaustion and say, “But it says right here that YOU agree to empty the Diaper Genie!”. You are going to draw back a nub.

LaCroix tastes like the only soft drink allowed in a cyberpunk dystopia where no one is allowed to feel emotions.

Just rent a Home Depot truck when you actually need to haul stuff.

Even if you have never seen how three dots are arranged on a die, you must surely know that it would be the same arrangement on both dice!

But... the threes? How can you position the pips two different ways? 

“I’ve been sober for 22 years”

Lol, so wait a sec... you don’t think there are going to be more MCU movies after the next Avengers?
I’ve got bad news for you...

And Republican Jesus, seeing the money exchangers and others gathered within the church; loudly proclaimed “thy will have my cut or be cast out, bitches”.

You would have to buy a lot of gas to offset the cost of a new or new to you car considering cost of car, increased insurance premiums, sales tax, and increased excise tax. Holding onto that payed off car a couple years really pays off. Today's cars, especially Japanese models hold up well to 200k if you treat them…