Jesus! Bruce Willis ain’t dead yet. 

I like the band PUP. 

At what point do you have enough money that you don’t need to scam your audience? 

I’m beginning to think method acting is just an excuse to be an asshole. 

Even after the allegations?

The best April Fools joke was director Adam Wingard releasing an amazing soundtrack for a fictional sequel to The Guest.

Did they apologize for their transphobic nickname for the Transformer movies yet?

Quit “yucking my yum” by not allowing me to think that people that watch award shows by themselves are psychos. Sorry but it’s only acceptable to watch award shows at a party and even then if it is party for anything other than the Oscars or Tonys than that’s weird too. Like imagine going to an Emmy party or one for…

Imagine being excited about the Grammys. Like it’s not your job to cover them you are just genuinely excited to sit down and watch the Grammys from start to finish. Absolute freak behavior. 

Stephen King didn’t finish the Dark Tower until he almost died from getting hit by a van. Just saying...

I just like mocking his terrible and offensive performance in I Am Sam.

Saw a commercial for this before I watched Benedetta on Hulu. Now I’m imagining what Paul Verhoeven would create if he was asked to make a single camera American sitcom.

Should have used KC Green’s “This is fine” dog instead and paid him handsomely of course. 

It’s been a week or two since someone has dunked on a Crypto Bro with a shitty NFT avatar in my timeline. I hope that means the craze is over but I doubt I’m that lucky.

Who would have guessed Josh would turn out to be the Shawn Michaels and Drake would be the Marty Jannetty of Drake & Josh?

Isn’t the owner of Jimmy John’s a big game hunter? As far as I know Jersey Mike hasn’t killed an elephant.

I don’t know if that is intended to be a racist dog whistle or not but after some thought it is probably Tyler Perry because of the Christian thing. Churches will literally organize trips or have screenings of the latest Tyler Perry movie similar to what they did with Mel Gibson’s Passion of the Christ and Kirk…

Y’all ain’t playing Turdle?

I used to be one of those lame assholes that was like “there is no good music anymore” but every month there is like two or three albums I’m excited for like Drug Church, Band of Horses, and I’m curious about the new Franz Ferdinand album. Hell next month I’m pumped for the new PUP album.

Who is more review proof, Adam Sandler or Tyler Perry?